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I am an egocentric. I have always been an egocentric, and when people ask me why am I so obsessed with myself, I always answer “How could I not be so obsessed with myself since I’m so mother****ing cool?”. All my life I have always been in the spotlight, with my friends, at school, with my sport mates, in my family. I think I could call myself a spoiled child. On the other hand I can actually swear that I have never desired to be so spoiled, I have never liked the idea, so I stopped acting like a spoiled child. I still cannot tell why, maybe some kind of frustration, but overtime I started hiding myself, remaining out of the way and speaking less and less with people about myself. I became, as some people say, an hermit, a vagabond, a lone guy who only think about himself and who does not care about others. I became an apathetic person, in a nutshell. As I said before, I have not always been like that, I used to be a very sunny guy with lots of friends and  things to do and say, I was really an extremely expansive guy and in fact I still am, but I hide it. I am only recently rediscovering this side of me and that is probably because I am getting to know some people I think are worth knowing. Or maybe because I was actually suffering for the absence of love and friendship in my life. Since I built my armour of apathy I have never felt the need of dealing with people, but recently I came up with the idea that even if I do not really need people in my life, maybe I could at least try to get them involved in my everyday life, maybe I could discover a new and happier way of life. I can honestly say that if you are a cold person like me, even the merest act of kindness or love fills your heart and hit you like a tsunami. Now I can really tell that I do not need love in my life, but I miss it. But, unfortunately, it is not all peaches and dandelions. The negative side of all this story is that when you are not used to get fond of someone, there is the risk of exceeding your limits, of misunderstanding your feelings or the ones of the others. In other words there is the risk of being disappointed, and if you are very emotionally attached to someone the blow is terrible. Fortunately I have never felt that sensation, I’m a lone guy, I do not like people, I do not have relationships and I am incredibly handsome.


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